No that’s not the title of my new metal album, but rather an observation. An observation of this new, confusing world I have been blessed to be a part of.
The internet. What a bittersweet realm. A place that has consumed so many unproductive hours of my life (I’m looking at you, Buzzfeed.). It’s heaven for those seeking limitless amounts of knowledge, but it should come with a warning for some. Those some being people who let their emotions control them. People like me, who look online for human interaction, when God only knows that this is the absolute wrong place to look for it.
Perhaps I didn’t get the memo or I took the name too literally, but I thought social media to me was a place to socialize. You know, a place to check up on friends and meet new ones. Oh God, how 2007 of me right?
But as the years progress, our desires for a true human connection regress. I mean, are we really keeping in contact through these platforms or are we just acting in a never-ending movie of our lives and forcing everyone to watch? When we post a picture, a post, a whatever…we care more about how many comments we get rather than who comments. We want to be noticed. We determine our self-worth by the likes we get to impress our facebook friends, be it a cousin or someone you met at a conference once. We want to make sure everyone knows what we’re doing 24 hours of the day. We want to be famous. We want attention, not communication. And so we build this super extensive profile that doesn’t reflect our real lives at all and everyone lets you know about how WONDERFUL you are and how much they miss you. But when it comes to face to face interaction, how many of these people actually make an effort to see you or say these things into your eyes?
And so we’re slipping into this digital realm, sliding into a dark hole of narcissism. Me me me. Let me show you what I did. Let me show you where I traveled. Let me show you how great I look today. Occasionally, I’ll acknowledge your existence by liking your selfie, and you’ll settle for it. I mean that qualifies as “keeping in contact”, right? Some of us go so far and determining how cool we are by allowing strangers into our personal lives and liking our personal contact. We feel oh so flattered by having a billion followers on Twitter, but we don’t know who they even are.
I’m not acting like I’m innocent and have never indulged in such behavior. I enjoy sharing my life with people, just as much as you probably do. But is it enough for me to consider it as human contact? No. It’s just me giving into human nature of talking about myself.
If anything, I’m lonelier. Because people won’t make an effort to talk to me if I’m already talking about myself constantly. Why would they want to call you and hang out if they already know what’s up? We are getting all this attention, yet we still feel so alone because it’s not real. It’s not personal. I mean, why would people put any more effort than a click of a mouse when we act satisfied by it? Maybe I put too much thought into it, but I don’t send a message for the hell of it. I do it to genuinely see what’s up. I do it with hopes that you won’t forget about me in the barrages of messages you get about people promoting themselves to feed that narcissistic monster in their bellies.
I apologize deeply for my cynicism, and perhaps I take myself too seriously. Maybe even, I’m being insatiable…but if we are getting all this attention, why is it that we still feel so empty?